How to Practice Self-Care After a Difficult Divorce

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Going through a divorce is a very difficult and emotionally trying time. After such an event, it is important to take time to address your emotional needs. Practicing self-care is essential to moving on from a difficult divorce. Just as you would show compassion to a friend, show compassion to yourself.

Create a New Routine

Divorce can leave your life feeling disorganised. Establishing a routine can help restore order to your life because it creates structure. There are many benefits to creating a routine. Your routine helps you stay busy and have a sense of normality. It can give you something to look forward to. In these times of change, it can be helpful to maintain consistency. Do not be frustrated if you don’t always follow your routine. There is going to be some trial and error. See what parts of your routine work and what parts do not. Your goal is not to hold yourself to unnecessarily rigid standards, but rather to find what best works for you in order to establish balance.

Keep a Journal

This will be a difficult time and you will have a lot of feelings to process. Keeping a journal can be a beneficial way to help you process these emotions. You can write out your emotions instead of bottling them up. This allows you to become more self-aware and it can enhance your sense of well-being.  Regularly journaling can help you identify any unhealthy patterns or behaviors. As you recognize these patterns and behaviors, you can take action to adjust your life in a positive manner. Overall, journaling helps you to move from a negative to a positive mindset especially about yourself.

Move Closer to Family

It is natural to feel lonely after a divorce. To combat this loneliness and to find support, consider moving closer to family. Your family knows you intimately and it can be helpful to talk through things with them. They can give you different perspectives and broaden your viewpoints. Moving closer to family also gives you a chance to reconnect with loved ones. Overall, it can be emotionally strengthening.

Being close to family can also be a smart choice logistically. It can be a rough transition to no longer share household responsibilities. Having family nearby can help you manage your home as you adjust. If you need to go on a vacation for your mental health, you will have someone available to watch your house. If you have children, your family may be able to help babysit as needed.

Adopt a Pet

Another way to combat loneliness is to adopt a pet. There are many benefits to having a pet. First of all, they will provide you with emotional support and companionship. They also are reliant on you, so taking care of a pet gives you a sense of responsibility. Depending on the pet, you also can have the opportunity for exercise and outdoor activity. This is especially true of dogs. If you live in an apartment, a small breed like Havanese puppies can be a great choice. These dogs are particularly affectionate, energetic and happy.


It is important to include exercise in your daily routine. There are many physical and mental health benefits to exercise. Exercise is known to release endorphins, which are chemicals in your brain that relieve stress and cause a general feeling of well-being. As you exercise, you can see a positive increase in your mood. It can make you feel happier and more fulfilled. Exercise can also improve your sleep because it tires you out more during the day. Overall, it improves sleep quality and duration. It can also help improve your mental health because it helps reduce stress, depression and anxiety. Exercise can also give you another activity to look forward to in your daily routine.

Join a Group

After a divorce, it is important to have a support system. One way to find support is joining a group. This can be any kind of group from an exercise group to a cooking class to an official support group. You will have people you can reach out to and establish relationships with. A group will also give you something to look forward to. There can be many activities you can participate in with others and it can help to keep you busy. It is important to have positive influences in your life and joining a group is a great way to find these influences.


As you process your emotions you may want to consider taking up the practice of meditation. The aim of meditation is to help you embrace your emotions and live in the present. Although it may be tempting, do not suppress your emotions. Do not allow them to control you. Accept your feelings and increase your self-awareness. Meditation can help you build skills to manage your emotions instead of avoiding them.

There are many approaches to meditation and it might seem overwhelming. However, you can start small. There are many apps that can lead you through meditation. You can even look up guided meditations on the internet. If you prefer, you can also do meditation on your own. Simply find a quiet spot and do some deep breathing. Connect with yourself and focus on the moment.

Take Time to Process

A divorce can be a traumatic and difficult event. Do not feel pressured to “feel better” at a certain time. You may wish you could move on faster, but beating yourself up about it is ultimately counterproductive. Take all the time you need to process your emotions. You may also experience periods of happiness intermixed with periods of depression. Do not feel discouraged by this. Everyone works through difficult emotions in their own way.

Divorces can be exhausting and taxing. Do not feel discouraged as you work through your emotions in the aftermath. It is important that you practice self-care as you process these emotions. Make sure all your needs are being met as you work toward a positive new chapter in your life.

Read this next: How to Find the Energy to Do More Throughout Your Day

With Love,

Taryn xoxo

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